I’m very excited today; an old friend just gave me a wonderful idea.
It’s 16 years since the Registrar General of Scotland allowed humanists to conduct legal marriage. The intention was to allow couples to write their ceremonies in their own words and ever since then, I’ve been asking my couples to do their ‘homework’ as the basis for what we might say on the day.
The task is a simple one; to remember their stories, to look at what made them realise that this is the person they trust with their lives and to think about what it is that marriage means to them.
The process works really well, and since then it’s helped more than a thousand couples to create unique, memorable and inspiring wedding ceremonies, but I’ve never liked the word ‘homework’.
For most people, homework has more negative associations than positive ones.
It’s something you’ve got to do, not something you want to do.
It takes up time you’d rather use for fun things.
It’s something on which you’re going to be marked or judged.
This morning I had a meeting with Liz and Al, who are getting married next July. It was the first time I’d met Liz, but I’ve known Al for a long time. We worked together in advertising at several different agencies, we did some award-winning work, and we always had a lot of fun. Al has since gone on to found his own creative agency, working with some of the world’s most famous brands, and he’s absolutely at the top of his game.
So when I said, “I’ve always had a problem with the ‘homework’ word,” it took him about six seconds to come up with a much better one.
Like all the best ideas, it says what it does on the tin.
My guess is that Liz and Al will love doing their LoveWork and I can’t wait to read it.
I’m pretty sure that you’re going to love it too!
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[…] If you’ve read my blog at all over the last 12 years or more, you already know that Lovework is at the heart of the creative process I ask all my couples to undertake when they’re wondering what to say about why they’re getting married. I used to call it homework, as I explained here. […]
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