Claire & Fraser’s Humanist Wedding at Carlowrie Castle

I was so pleased when I saw Claire and Fraser featured as “wedding of the week” on Tie the Knot Scotland. The photos really capture the joy of the day, but what made me even happier was to read what they said about the whole process of creating their ceremony.

Here’s the full story, in their own words…

So maybe I was naive when booking a humanist for our wedding. I was under the illusion that they would write the whole thing for you once you tell them the story of how you met etc…. well how wrong was I! 😂 

Once we did our “homework” and answered the questions, I thought that would be it. However when Tim replied back and said, “ok… here’s some examples  of different ceremonies…now write your own,” I was a bit taken aback: I believe the words “what are we paying him for?” came out my mouth (sorry Tim 🙈😳)

However once we got into the swing of it, and read Tim’s book (which I bought off my own back, as we were honestly clueless) we were on a roll!

Writing your ceremony yourself makes it so much more personal: I even managed to sneak in a f.r.i.e.n.d.s quote which made everyone laugh.

We kept our ceremony very light hearted and Tim delivered it brilliantly! Everyone commented on how it set up the tone for the rest of the day – and how brilliant Tim was. 

He was always there for any advice, no matter how big or small…. Fraser struggled with the first part, but he gave Tim a call and Tim talked him through it. 

We also chose to have a rehearsal a week or so before the wedding, just the two of us and Tim, and this helped massively with taking the anxiety away. 

I believe Fraser also asked Tim what he was planning on wearing because he didn’t want Tim to clash with his family tartan in the photos: I was shocked that I hadn’t thought of this and I felt a wee bit embarrassed to have asked, but Tim was more than accommodating. He said he wouldn’t wear a kilt, and he opted for a smart suit instead. 

We honestly cannot recommend Tim highly enough; he is by far the best in the business.

I LOVE the honesty of what you said, Claire & Fraser, so thank you from the bottom of my heart for saying it how it was!

I know that many couples find themselves cursing my name when they realise that they’re going to have to write the ceremony themselves (even though I make that clear from the very start!)

It’s true; lots of celebrants will write your ceremony for you, but I don’t for a very simple reason.

Humanists in Scotland campaigned for more than twenty years to give couples the freedom to create ceremonies in their own words and it’s a huge privilege. More than 15 years have gone by since the first legal humanist wedding in 2005, and because humanist marriage is so popular, nobody knows how much hard work it took to get that change in the law. (They’re still campaigning in England and Wales to this day…)

I take that privilege very seriously. Yes, writing your own ceremony takes a bit of effort, but as Fraser and Claire realised the moment they got married, it’s worth it!

My profound thanks go to them for their lovely words and to Scott and Carrie of Camerashy Photography who took these wonderful photos. You can see many more of them here, on Tie the Knot Scotland

  1. You mean, we've got to write this ourselves? - Tim Maguire left a comment on March 1, 2022 at 9:51 pm

    […] take my word for it. Claire & Fraser aren’t the only couple who cursed my name during the process, but as they said in their story, they totally understood that writing your own ceremony is the […]

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